Skip to main content

Stop Looking For A Good Man

Last night, I ran across this article about how more men no longer believe in committed relationship and marriage. In the article which I will share at the bottom of this story, men felt like “women aren't women anymore”. Which in a way is true however, men are no longer the same either but that another story for another day. Women asked me all the time in my opinion what is a good man, or where have all the good men gone. And that a question within a question, because you have to asked yourself why do you feel like there aren’t any good men anymore; and in your opinion what make a good man. Is a good man hard to find, or are we asking for too much too soon? My quest for a “good man” ended, three years ago because I learned that a good man doesn’t exist it like looking for a perfect man so to speak. If you put it in your mind that there isn’t any good men then you will find nothing but men that doesn’t fit your criteria, while he could fit the bill of what you’re actually looking for.

In this generation, it seems like everyone have a fear of commitment or we settle for what we think that we need in order to be in a happy relationship. It was shown that in most relationship now, they settle to avoid being alone not realizing that they’re still alone. Do I believe in a good man yes, however a good man is a feeling not a reality. When you feel like you with a good man it not content or just saying the words, but a successful in manifesting feelings of beauty within your heart. This includes in the way he interacts with you physically and mentally. However, women be so wrap up in their minds that they can’t see when a good man is right in front of them (trust me I know). Women are learning now that a “perfect man” doesn’t exist, but now they replace with the term “perfect man” with the term “good man” which still setting them up for failure. Because you are setting up a goal that no matter how bad, you want him to reach it he won’t reach that goal.

It just like I wrote are we asking for too much too soon? It like on Facebook when a woman who is known to jump from man to man start a new relationship with man after two months thinking, and claiming that he is her new man. And yes, we can say that after two month he should be ready for a relationship but what do you really know about a man after just two month? The problem is we no longer take the time to get to truly know a person, we be in a rush, and left wondering what happen when the connection doesn’t work out. A good man comes when you at a place in your life to accept love, and is ready to build a mature relationship just because you feel like you’re ready for a relationship doesn’t mean that you’re ready for a relationship. when you meet a good man, he will always possess a strong and unshakable character. As such, by default, the man is inspirational in his words and deeds. He never ceases to evoke feelings of inspiration. A good man will inspire a woman to be the best version of herself. And when you rush to find a “good man” you will always meet those bad spirits that will waste your time, and suck your energy dry and make you believe that there aren’t any good men out here anymore.

When you’re dating, I learned that you got to asked yourself what are you truly looking for overall for your mind,body, and spirit. Furthermore, when you're dating you need a man that can touch all three. As I grow on this journey of self I’m learning all my mistakes, one of them was not dating a man that didn’t offer me a teaching of self. Like I said a good man never really gives himself too much credit. Though he may be intelligent, a good man seeks to always self-improvement; whether this is through learning something new, taking on added responsibilities, or getting into better shape, a good man prides himself on becoming better. And when you’re with a real good man he will you offer that as well, sometimes it takes a journey of self to meet a man that will give you all that you’re desire. Sometimes we got to live, and release before we try to share ourselves with another person. A good man only comes after you done with your completion, and if you’re not done with your completion then it not time for you to meet that good man. But as I always say after every story what do I know, I’m just here to drop some knowledge on my journey of love and self.


Popular posts from this blog

When Hurt People Hurt: Nas and Kelis

You can’t fix what you didn’t break. Sometimes the demons we face, are not the person we’ve dated fault. We’ll never know the demons anyone truly face, until they decide if they want to take it out on us. We try to be there and show them something different but soon realize their demons are slowly killing us. As I come to learn a man is his mother image. A man is what his mother make him to be, he may carry out some of his father actions; but his character come from his mother. Like a woman is what her father tell her to be. Whether he speak it with his words or speak it with his actions (by not being in her life), a woman carry her father words with her everywhere she goes and in all of her relationships. That why sometimes when a man is reckless, if his mother understand his actions then no one else opinion of him even matter. Vice versa with a woman. We chose to play doctor but doesn’t stay around to fully cure that person injuries. We just add more cuts, to an already wounded soul…

My Thoughts on Love Is...

As I always say, when the love is real it not meant for anyone on the outside to understand. I always ask women “what would they do for love?” Some women answer, while some just look at me like I’m crazy. Everyone loves to claim they have a limitation on love. However, as one told me you only have limitation when you haven’t met your match. Now, before I could write this story I had to re-watch this series twice just to make sure I was understanding what I was watching. Therefore, after watching this show I got something to say and it won’t be pretty. My new addiction celebrating black love is Love Is”, which tells the origin story of a modern-day love, before social media came and destroyed well trying to destroy love for everyone. This show has become the topic of discussion more than this season of “Insecure” (I’m still waiting for that wow moment of this season). Love Is_ is set in '90s. And tells the story of two Black creatives who fall for each other quickly. Nuri works as…

What to Do When A Person Ghost You

We all knew this day was coming and now it time I write about it. This Sunday night, was the season finale of “insecure." Now, before I get to the point of the story I must share my thoughts of this whole season. I was looking for that spark this season like season one, and two, but I didn’t receive one until the end. Even the whole Daniel and Issa storyline that was a letdown. When I saw she brought back Lawrence I was hoping that finally they would work it out, but again Lawrence on that bitch ass shit. However, the relationship between Nathan and Issa was the talk on black twitter. While Issa thoughts she finally met a good guy who challenge her, Nathan proved that “the lighter the eyes, the bigger the lies.” While we have to wait until Next Year to see exactly where this relationship will go, Nathan pulled a move that was close to home for many people. It hurt like hell when a person leave you without any warning or reasons. It leave you asking yourself, “What did you do?” We…