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The Ugly Truth About Dating Men With Children: Yandy Simth And Mendeecees Harris

Last night, I watched one of my favorite guilty pleasures “love & hip hop”. As usual, the show was full of fake drama. However, there one storyline that always catches my eye. Mendeecees was sentenced to 8 years in prison for drug trafficking charges in 2015, and while he is serving his sentence he asked his wife Yandy Smith to hold down the household. And keep a close relationship with his children mothers, and to make sure that the children have a close relationship. Well that if you watch the show, then you know that didn’t happen. Their storyline shares the ugly truth about dating men with children, and it also shows how women can be so vindictive when they’re not over their children father.

Mendeecees and yandy have been together, since 2007. Since the beginning of their relationship, it has always been a difficult relationship for the pair (many of yandy smith friend’s felt like she could do better than Mendeecees). However, their love has always been strong for each other, and that what brought the couple closer together. We first learned about this relationship in 2012. And in 2013, yandy announced that she was pregnant with the couple first child. Now for the longest everyone, thought that this was their first child together. But quickly learned that Mendeecees had a son, from a previous relationship. And we also discover that he had another son around the same time him, and yandy had their son as well. Now according to yandy, this other little boy was a “break baby”. Which sounds like bullshit to me, but I will keep my thoughts to myself. Both boys share, an eerie resemblance to each other. 

Which is why everyone thought, that this other little boy was also yandy son. And that when the baby mother's, took on an issue with Yandy. Because if you watched the show, then you know that Yandy is painted as the mother of the year (Mona Lee Scott has came out and confirmed that Yandy was the brain behind the show and she intern for her when she was in college). So,It didn’t surprise anyone when the other women came out, and start attacking her credibility. Both women claimed that they “hate” how Yandy is acting like she is the perfect mother (and that she doesn’t know her place as the stepmother whatever that mean). Both women claimed that Yandy smith is not a good mother, and wife like she claim to be. So, instead of all three women sitting down; and working out their issues. The other two women refused to let their children, build a relationship with her children. All because of their hate for yandy smith, now I’m not saying that I believe her. Cause let be real here, we all know that it's a good chance that Mendeecees is lying to all three women. And that why they're taking their, issues out on yandy. Because when the pair got "married" in 2014, that when we start seeing more of these two women. Now on the show of course they’re going to paint a picture, that he talked to these women before he started his prison sentenced. However, if he did talk to these women then why would they wait until he in prison to start this disagreement? Because he didn’t talk to these women, and he knew that they were jealous of yandy from the start. And instead of handling his business before he start serving his time, he just sat there; and let this mess boil over.

Like I said earlier, their storyline shares the ugly truth about dating a man with children. While not all single parent relationships are vindictive, and hateful towards each other. It still took them some time to get to that place, where there are willing to put the children needs first before their own. One man once told me, that you should never date a man while his child is under 3. Because the relationship with the parents is a mess, and they’re not fully sure if their relationship is really over between them. As a woman, who has dated men with children. It's wasn’t the child that I had an issue with, it was the parent relationship that always bothers me (because the father always tries to downplay his relationship with his child mother). It would be nice to date a man without children, but I notice that I had more drama with a man who didn't have children. 

Then men who have a child (If a man is not mentally matured then it doesn’t matter if he has children, or not period). But people make mistakes, we say that we want a man that loves us regardless of our mistakes. But can’t seem to let it go, when a man make a mistake. While no child is a mistake, a man shouldn’t be judged because he has a child. Women say they want a perfect man, but can’t seem to understand that a perfect man will have flaws; and he will just be perfect enough just for you. However, women biggest fear about dating men with children is the fact that there still could be love between the parents. After they try to ensure you, that there isn't no love between them. And you will try to believe them, however their actions will prove otherwise. Furthermore, that what Mendeecees could have done. Why else would these women attack her, if they weren’t lead on by Mendeecees? Both women are beautiful, and doesn’t look like they would have a hard time finding a man. And just because they try to sell you that Mendeecees,and Yandy marriage is strong doesn’t mean they don’t have problems. After all, we have just learned that legally yandy and Mendeecees are not married.

But after watching love & hip hop it’s obvious that, their issues are with Mendeecees not yandy. They were angry at Mendeecees, before yandy came into the picture. You can tell that their hate is for that ring on her finger, and not her being a stepmother. Yes, I do believe that they’re jealous of yandy for trying to be a mother to all his kids. Because they were hoping that she would leave him, over their antics they pulled towards her. Because if yandy have left, then they would be fighting each other on who deserve the ring more. The point is it doesn’t, matter who stayed in the picture. Their anger is toward him, and not her parenting skills. In fact, you would hope they would want a woman that will treat their children like her own. But with these women today, you just don’t know. But while this storyline will make you second guess dating a man with a child, don’t let one person problems keep you from your soulmate. After all this is a reality show, they could get along just fine. And acting like they hate each other, yes that a stretch but people are willing to do anything for money these days. Furthermore, don’t let this keep you from a good man. I would whether date a man who is in his child life, then a man who have nothing to do with his child; and lying like he doesn't have children. Will they come together for the kids? time will time. But fellas if you know that your child mother, is not the woman you want to be with. Then tell her, be a man about the situation; and fix the problems before it becomes unfixable. Because I know I say at times, that some women deserve just to be a baby mother. But that is the eye of the beholder, just because she looks like a baby mother to you. Doesn't mean, that she is not a wife in the eyes of another man.


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