…but see, let’s not confuse the pace with the time. Many times, we look at the time and attach that to our relationships and/or connections. You know, 5 years to the wedding, 90 day rules, 3 day plans, etc. But truthfully, that’s the wrong thing to gauge. What we should attribute our relationships to is the pace. Slow and steady wins the race because there is a consistent pace that keeps one progressing without overextending their efforts. This is the position that many of the greater relationships find themselves.
Now, first we must know that the pace is initially established through the magical concept of synchronicity. Before we can simply “move at a good pace,” we must determine what the common ground is for the person we seek to involve ourselves with. One of the greater illusions we face is establishing and defining the pace AFTER we have developed a relationship. This is an illusion because our “attractions” are really vain afflictions. We get with people for their looks, occupations, financial stability, living situations, etc. Now, this is not to say that those things aren’t important because they are extremely vital to the longevity and progression of relationships, families and generations. However, take all of these things away and what are you left with? If your answer is nothing, you should not be in a relationship; or even thinking of one for that matter. But if you have a definitive answer that is shared between the two of you, no matter how small it may be, that is what you all should be building your pace around; moving to that template. This template can be anything; multiple things. Intelligence, books, the gym, the theater; whatever. But allow that commonality to be the basis of your pace. Use that to explore and understand one another. Within that understanding allow the pace to be solidified by the person who is the slower mover; As the saying goes, a team can only be as strong as the weakest link.
Understand that I am not using weak as a term of inferiority. Rather, as an objective viewpoint to set a foundation. If my car can go 240 mph and your car can go 160 mph, it is ridiculous of me to push 240 when we are supposed to arrive at the same place; at the same time. Conversely, it is even more ridiculous of me to expect you to push beyond 160. It will cause you to redline and exhaust yourself. Moreover, I shouldn’t expect you to set the pace at your maximum. It’s completely unfair to keep you at 100% when I’m below 70%. But what we can do is progress at your 70% until it gets easier; pushing higher and higher. That way, you get to stretch yourself enough to make the necessary progression while never exhausting yourself trying to move at a pace that is too high to continually sustain at your present moment.
And this is what I feel creates the foundation for lasting relationships. Pace and patience. Establish a set pace to travel along and be patient as the milestones come to you; rather than racing towards them. A steady pace allows us to create the memories, build the harmonies and solidify the longevity for the long haul. I feel that we should restructure our minds to focus on paces instead of time frames. A pace and a step are synonymous at times and a journey of 1000 miles begins with one step…one pace. Are we pacing ourselves for the finish line or are we racing to it; trying to beat the clock? Who knows? You decide…but, as always, it’s not definitive law or anything. Just my perspective and what not…dig me?
Peace, Love, Knowledge and Freedom.
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