Do you remember the first time you got your first real job, you love that job, and how you wanted to grow with the company. You couldn’t understand why so many of your co-workers were quitting and complaining about the company because to you everything felt good about this company, and you saw yourself staying with the company for a long time. But now, the years had pass by, and you have seen no growth with this company, and now you understand why so many of your former co-workers left the company because now you feel stuck, and in need of a new environment, and don’t want to stay another day at this dead end job. Now picture this as your current relationship, when women who are in relationship asked me about the dating scene, I am guilty of telling other women to stay in their relationship because being single in this dating market is horrible not realizing that I'm telling them to stay in a unhealthy relationship. But it's true why lie about it, with all this social media out there getting pussy has gotten so much easier so people are not looking a relationship like they did once before, or you have to settle in order to be in a relationship. But even before social media took over I still saw women in “workforce” relationship just to say they are in a relationship.
I remember this one time particularly, my young co-worker once told me that she couldn’t leave her fiancé because they share a PlayStation 3, and 46 inch TV (yes, that was her actually reason why she stayed in that relationship). Yes she was young, 19 at the time to be exact, but she like other women who get into a ‘workforce’ relationship they stay because they have gotten comfortable with the lifestyle that come with being in that relationship. A “workforce” relationship is when you stay in a relationship because they are comfortable, and in enjoy the benefits that comes with the relationship. But you see there is no growth in the relationship, and also they are very well aware that the relationship is just a dead end relationship. When it come easy to love someone, acceptance is never easy. We can't make someone see all that we have offer, nor make them love us, nor can we make them change. All we can do is move on and stop wasting time. But at the time, your spouse didn’t seem like a waste. They gave you butterflies, and your face would light up when they called you, and they were all you could talk about. But fast forward to now, where all that loving feeling is nothing but hate now, and now you feel stuck in the relationship. Because of the time you spent building this relationship to what it is now.
You no longer dress up for him, and he no longer make that effort to take you out, and to make you feel special like he used to do. And now you both have started to schedule sex because you have no desire to have sex with your spouse anymore ( I don’t give two fucks how bad the relationship become between you guys if you have to pick the day out of the week to have sex, and that is the only time you two are having sex then it time to sit down, and work on the relationship ASAP). And work on whatever is broken in the relationship. Still neither parties are willing to step up to the plate to talk about the issues in their relationship, because like your job you both have become used to the keeping your feelings bottled in, and you both stay even though you're not happy, because its pays the bills. But like many people who are unhappy with their employer, instead of taking their problem to the supervisor they have an issue with, you talk about your personal problems with everyone in the office but that supervisor. In which causes the information to get ahold to the wrong person, and by the time it’s get back to that supervisor they don’t know what is the truth, or just a flat out lie.
We look at the history in a relationship as the chemistry that keep us together. We remember those time where we were at a low point in our lives, and they were there for every moment, but seem to forget how they could have played a role in that break down. Your time is way too valuable to be wasting on people that can't accept you for who you are, it’s hard to let go of a place that made us feel safe, and took care of us when no one else did. But if you know there no growth the only person that holding you back is you, but what do I know all I can do is give you advice on my spiritual journey of life, and love.
That Is All
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( if you haven't seen this show this is a must watch its on HBO on sundays night).